‘I feel empty’: Transgender skier worries Alberta bill would ban her from competing

If an Alberta bill restricting transgender women in sports is passed, she fears she won’t be able to register for the event she’s participated in for years.

“I just feel empty,” Hadley, 44, said in a phone interview from Edmonton.

“This is a sport I want to continue doing until I don’t have the mobility to do so.”

Competing has helped her stay healthy and motivated and feel less isolated, she said.

“It’s my reason to go outside. I feel free and at peace when skiing.”

Alberta’s United Conservative Party government introduced last week the Fairness and Safety in Sport Act. It has passed first reading in the legislature.

If enacted, it would ban transgender athletes from competing in female amateur sports, require school and sporting organizations to report eligibility complaints and see the creation of sports leagues with “mixed-gender” divisions.

Sport Minister Joseph Schow has said athletes across Alberta miss out on opportunities because they have to compete against transgender athletes. However, he said the province doesn’t track the number of transgender athletes.

At an unrelated news conference Thursday, Schow said the proposed changes would include a self-declaration honour system, with more details to be ironed out if the bill is passed.

“If there are disputes, we’ll work with provincial sports organizations and other stakeholders to make sure we’re addressing those on a case-by-case basis,” he said.

Organizations would also be able to contact the province to help them implement the new rules, he added.

His press secretary, Amber Edgerton, would not say which sporting organizations were consulted. She also wouldn’t say if the province would fund the creation of coed divisions.

Hadley, born and raised in Edmonton, played rugby for nine years on a local team before competing in cross-country skiing.

She decided to leave the rugby team after she came out to some of its members and felt unwelcome, she said. Conversations in locker rooms were difficult to listen to.

“There would be a lot of jokes and comments about trans people and even gay people that were not welcoming,” she said.

She decided to become a solo athlete, she said, as several sporting associations have policies that allow transgender athletes to compete in the gender division they identify with.

Hadley said she competed in the male division of cross-country skiing until 2021, when she transitioned.

The associations required her to be on hormone replacement therapy for a year, ensuring levels are stable, before she switched to competing with women, she said.

The hormone changes lowered her stamina and strength, she added, and she began clocking slower skiing times.

“I haven’t won any of the races,” she said.

Transgender women in sports are often told they have an advantage due to their testosterone levels, said Hadley, but hers are well below the average woman.

She said she also finds some transgender women are targeted for being big-boned, but that doesn’t give them a competitive advantage. It also undermines the reality that there are tall and strong non-transgender women too, she added.

“Trans athletes train so hard and are made to feel like any sort of success is just based on their genetics.”

Hadley said the lack of detail with Alberta’s plan has created confusion.

“It’s just outlawing something without providing a solution,” she said. “It’s dressed up as being in everyone’s best interests, when it is not.”

She’s also confused about how new divisions would be created, regulated and funded.

“Where’s this extra money coming from, or is it just leaving it up to (the associations), and then nothing happens and transgender people just don’t have a place to compete?” Hadley said.

She said it’s also unclear why Alberta’s government is focused on the province’s transgender community, as it’s relatively small.

“It feels like the government of my home is trying to sweep me under the rug,” Hadley said.

She said transgender people already feel isolated in sports and society.

“I get elbowed in the head on the bus a little too often for it to be an accident.”